Friday, April 13, 2007


Every now and then (or maybe a little more frequently than every now and then) I glance at Craig's List to see what kinds of apartments are available for rent in the New York City area. I have found some places that I would love to go and look at, but unfortunately it is too early to really be pursuing something, especially when most of the places advertised now will be available by May 1st.

However, I have learned a few things about searching for housing in this way, things that I had forgotten since the last time I looked for a place to live in NYC:

1. Writing a headline in all caps is about as appealing as listening to a used car salesman scream about his Cadillacs for sale. Water view sounds much nicer than WATER VIEW, I promise. Indoor voices on Craig's List, please.

2. "Cozy" can sometimes be a euphemism for "make sure you don't make any sudden movements, else you're liable to smack your head into a wall or swing your arm around and break a lamp". I learned this one from Mike. And considering that I managed to break a lamp cover with my arm the other night in our very spacious living room, I don't think cozy is the best idea for us.

3. Grammar is important when describing a place. Consider the following:

If you are interested in these living quarters Please leave:

# you can be reached {PLEASE LEAVE}
# Of occupants Salary

A comma would have been really helpful in that first sentence, and after the second "PLEASE LEAVE", I began to wonder if the one posting this was trying to send subliminal messages to the voices in their head.

4. Some people are willing to rent out the one and only bedroom they have and sleep on the couch, they are so hard-pressed for money. I actually didn't forget this piece of advice, and I doubt I'll ever forget the conversation I had with a woman: "this apartment has a really nice bedroom, plenty of space and everything. I sleep in the living room." "Did you say you sleep in the living room?" "YES. It's not a problem, okay? You'd barely even notice me." I feel like my life is richer, having that conversation to reflect on.

I have to say that I am ecstatic to not be apartment-hunting on my own this time. Or moving. Last time I borrowed a friend's 16-passenger van, loaded all my crap into it, and drove it from Princeton to Crestwood, then from Crestwood to Brooklyn. I honked at a guy who cut me off during that trip, and for a split second I was pretty sure he was going to get out of his car and have a word with me. Talk about having your life flash before your eyes. But this time around, at least I'll have the deacon to protect me.


Roland said...


This is Ray from St. Vlad's. Odds that you remember me: .05%, but that's ok.

Just found your blog (I read it once some time ago but...). Some thoughts:

1. On the alien girl; It's especially heinous because the traits being sold as 'sexy' - small hands, bone-thin legs, etc - also participate in the sexualization of girls.

I've been doing some research at the NCC this past year on Human Trafficking as part of my internship and I can say without a shred of doubt that we've set up a really bad dichotomy between the age we want people to find sexually ideal (generally mid-adolesence) and the ideal age of taking on the adult responsibilities of sexual fidelity and familial priorities (generally after the mid-life crisis). Sadly, it's even effecting the kind of prostitutes people want. nuts!

2. Consider my internet 'axios!' something I would say for Mike anytime. In fact, everyone here still sings Mike's praises just from knowing him for one year (during which he fervently denied clerical interest). Plus, I hear that he married well. I can't verify that of course, but it's key for success in any leadership role. :)

3. In regard to leadership positions, I know it's a mix of scary and exhilarating, but i'm firmly convinced that the health of an institution, especially a religious one, is only as strong as the quality of people who deem it worthy of their sacrificial support. Both you and your husband are, in my estimation, big health boosts for a church that can always need them.

4. What's Mike going to study at Fordham? There's an off chance that I will be joining him in a year.

Sorry for the long note!


Julia said...

Just wanted to say that this post is hilarious. I'm happy and excited for you guys.